The Human Home Run

Hey old man, don't go calling yourself the human home run when you're getting launched from short centerfield. That's bullshit. You're cheating the game, the young fans, but mostly you're cheating your own craft. The human pop up, fine; the human can of corn, yeah, but you sir are no human home run.

So either get yourself a bigger cannon or keep that toy in your back yard. Unless you can come up with a power move everyone is sure to love, like the human ground rule double.